Trevor, Jeff, Annie, Donald, Ken et al…

I would forgive you for thinking these were the names of our children. They are, in fact, our cars, our computers and our barbecue respectively. We are a family who personifies … everything has a name and, for that reason, we tend to get emotionally and irrationally attached to inanimate objects. Trevor, who is our 16 year-old Land Rover is on his last legs, having done 164,000 miles, but we can’t bring ourselves to put him down. He’s part of the family; he’s the equivalent of our pet dog. And everyone in the village knows Trevor and even enquires after him: ‘What was Trevor doing in town today?’; ‘Has Trevor had a bump?; ‘Oh no, is Trevor poorly again?’  We’re starting to think that people like Trevor more than they do us, adding to our trepidation about taking him to the scrap yard. We wonder if our naming of objects has become an unhealthy and time-wasting obsession.  The entirety of our mealtime one night was taken up with naming the newest computer: ‘Mac’ – ‘McDonalds’ – ‘Ronald’ – ‘Ronald McDonald’ – ‘Donald’!!! Cheers all round the table. If you apply the same puerile logic, you’ll soon figure out why our barbecue is called Ken! Or is it a cute and endearing practice, worthy of encouraging others to follow in an attempt to get kids to treat valuable possessions with a bit of respect? Nah, who am I kidding? It’s just plain weird.


Postscript: since writing this, the family decided that Trevor was too much of a liability and has been replaced with Duncan. I can confirm that we haven’t lost any friends, but we have disappointed two of the children, one of whom had his heart set on Ralph and the other of whom decided he would, from here on in, refer to Duncan by the only name he considered a true contender – Frederico Bob. (1471)

2 Responses to Trevor, Jeff, Annie, Donald, Ken et al…

  1. Kate on Thin Ice
    - October 14, 2012 Reply

    Some sad and moving posts in the list of Best Posts this week on BritMums. Yours provided genuine amusement and light relief. Love the barbecue name

    • thatfamilyfeeling
      - October 14, 2012 Reply

      I’m glad you like Ken! Thanks for finding the time to read and comment.

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